So I just got over with one of the best experiences I've had as person wanting to follow Christ and it feels awesome. This is totally the way God works and it's so beautiful and genuinely felt so thankful to be able to be a part of it.
Here's how the story goes...
While I was in South Africa I wanted to be away from all the influences around me so I could deal with some blows I had to my faith and to be able to sort things out with God by myself. The time away was just what I needed, but my purpose there to reconnect with God didn't happen until a few bumps in the road.
So when I came back, I felt weak, knowing and believing in God, but I was dealing with the aftermath of my mistakes and again feeling malnourished in my faith. It was at that time that I couldn't' get the idea out of my head and felt so driven and passionate about bringing the Just Walk Across the Room Course to the church I grew up in but hadn't really been to since high school.
I can't tell you how uncomfortable I felt presenting the idea to these two pastors that I really admired but was really intimated by -- what "right" did I have to lead this course in the position I was in? Surprisingly, I was given the go ahead, and then started the 7 month uncomfortable process of promoting and getting leaders involved from the church (where I was a stranger) and then lots of other administrative things that were over my head.
The 4 week course finally became a reality and took place in November. The course was a video and group discussion set up all about Jesus' love for people and how to share that love and the gospel. There were about 200 people, and it seemed to go over really well. I don't really care to know if or how people were affected by it, what was so cool to me was what it meant from me to God-- that He let me be a part of something so worthwhile when I was in a position of having nothing to offer.
I get the feeling that is how it's always suppose to be.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
New Chapter
I open my eyes some mornings still in shock of the day in front of me.
Last August through February I woke up in South Africa, traveling and experiencing a far away culture and people. March through August I woke up living in a new house back with my parents, waitressing nights and weekends, waking up when I wanted to and loving my Salsa Nights and T-Ball. Now when I wake up, all those people and places and experiences are still fresh on my mind, but life in front of me has changed dramatically again. Within a few days I stopped working at Olive Garden, started a new full time job, started three masters classes, changed my degree and said good bye to any second of free time. All these changes with the changes of people and time and mind frames that go with them all equaled up to a lot!
Not going to lie, that was a month ago and I'm finally over the urge to cry at any moment.
My new ideal day is waking up at 5ish, studying for a few hours, working from 8-4, and going to classes Tuesday and Wednesday (until 10pm!) nights at UMKC and studying every spare second in between. It's tough- that's the bad news, the good news is, I'm learning to like it a lot- or at least survive.
My new job is being a Para Professional in an elementary school in Raytown. I work in a self contained classroom of seven, 5-7 year old boys with Autism or Downsyndrom. Normal days include screaming meltdowns, violent tantrums, and chasing down one little boy that escapes and tries to run away. Normal days also include sweet moments of little boys looking out for each other and saying some hilarious things. I'm learning a whole new way to teach and I work with awesome woman, that thankfully know a lot more about what they're doing than I do!
Just as I was starting my Masters degree, I changed it to a Masters in Curriculum and Instruction with an emphasis in Multiculturalism. I don’t' know how this math works out, but for my 3 classes I have 8 books to read, with the awesome kind of chapters that are 50-100 pages long. I have been surprisingly shocked though at how interested I am in most of my reading. It's all about learning how to teach students with diverse cultures and include social justice in your teaching, which is right up my ally.
So that's it, this is the new chapter I'm in now. It's hard because with new and evermounting responsibilities it takes away from keeping up with people I care about. If you're reading this you're probably one of them!
Last August through February I woke up in South Africa, traveling and experiencing a far away culture and people. March through August I woke up living in a new house back with my parents, waitressing nights and weekends, waking up when I wanted to and loving my Salsa Nights and T-Ball. Now when I wake up, all those people and places and experiences are still fresh on my mind, but life in front of me has changed dramatically again. Within a few days I stopped working at Olive Garden, started a new full time job, started three masters classes, changed my degree and said good bye to any second of free time. All these changes with the changes of people and time and mind frames that go with them all equaled up to a lot!
Not going to lie, that was a month ago and I'm finally over the urge to cry at any moment.
My new ideal day is waking up at 5ish, studying for a few hours, working from 8-4, and going to classes Tuesday and Wednesday (until 10pm!) nights at UMKC and studying every spare second in between. It's tough- that's the bad news, the good news is, I'm learning to like it a lot- or at least survive.
My new job is being a Para Professional in an elementary school in Raytown. I work in a self contained classroom of seven, 5-7 year old boys with Autism or Downsyndrom. Normal days include screaming meltdowns, violent tantrums, and chasing down one little boy that escapes and tries to run away. Normal days also include sweet moments of little boys looking out for each other and saying some hilarious things. I'm learning a whole new way to teach and I work with awesome woman, that thankfully know a lot more about what they're doing than I do!
Just as I was starting my Masters degree, I changed it to a Masters in Curriculum and Instruction with an emphasis in Multiculturalism. I don’t' know how this math works out, but for my 3 classes I have 8 books to read, with the awesome kind of chapters that are 50-100 pages long. I have been surprisingly shocked though at how interested I am in most of my reading. It's all about learning how to teach students with diverse cultures and include social justice in your teaching, which is right up my ally.
So that's it, this is the new chapter I'm in now. It's hard because with new and evermounting responsibilities it takes away from keeping up with people I care about. If you're reading this you're probably one of them!
My mom has been such awesome support for me.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
VA
One of my new favorite life experiences is spending Wednesday mornings at the VA (Veterans Association- Hospital). I hope you get the chance to experience it someday. The vibe of this place comes alive as soon as you walk in and you get this deep sense of awe in the history of valor , defeate and comrodery that surrounds you. War Veterans come in that are ornery, overwhelmed, and more often than not hiding fear about the unstability of their health. Most of them are WW2 or Vietnam Vets who come proudly sporting their division with hats/jackets and are ready to share stories and life advice with whoever is in earshot. I get to be a part of a team that greets them and helps them find their way around the hospital. I've gotten to ease anxieties, hold hands, push wheel chairs, make appointments, wait in waiting rooms, go for cane 'fittings', share Laffy Taffy and today have to tell an elderly man I probably couldn't marry him even if he was willing to buy me a car. Ha! Lots of big flirts still in their old age! It's been a pretty special thing for me- especially thinking about my Grandpa (WW2) and my Dad (Vietnam) and my brother and his wife who are leaving for Army Boot Camp in October. In some round about way I feel like it's my chance to support them.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
News...
Two days ago my family found out my dad is eligible for Veterans Disability because of Agent Orange he was exposed to in Vietnam.
(Taking out the part of the story that includes my dad's health issues and how hard it's been for everyone to deal with them.)
I found out one of his benefits is that I have until I turn 26 (23 months) to accept money for school, more than enough to pay for a Masters. Insane, absolutely unreal. I never thought I would. (Will be paying for Undergrad for sometime still!)
But as of yesterday I decided, applied, and am taking the GRE this Saturday! Wow, still surprising news to me. Looking into online English as a Second Language Masters through NWMSU.
Feelings of insane humblness, graditude, weight of a 2 year commitment, and a touch of sceptisisim that it will help me in getting a job in the current economy-- but all the same, imense graditude for the oppurtunity.
(Taking out the part of the story that includes my dad's health issues and how hard it's been for everyone to deal with them.)
I found out one of his benefits is that I have until I turn 26 (23 months) to accept money for school, more than enough to pay for a Masters. Insane, absolutely unreal. I never thought I would. (Will be paying for Undergrad for sometime still!)
But as of yesterday I decided, applied, and am taking the GRE this Saturday! Wow, still surprising news to me. Looking into online English as a Second Language Masters through NWMSU.
Feelings of insane humblness, graditude, weight of a 2 year commitment, and a touch of sceptisisim that it will help me in getting a job in the current economy-- but all the same, imense graditude for the oppurtunity.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
These are a few of my favorite things...currently.
- Magic Shell Chocolate Fudge
...seriously, if you haven't tried it, it will change your life. Somehow this liquidy chocolaty goodness goes hard when it touches ice cream, creating sensational magic inside your mouth.
- The fact I have my days off.
...I tried for awhile to get a 2nd job for the day time, but so glad I didn't. Spent today with Ashley and wedding crafts, and tomorrow with Ang and my sis (and the little ones!) to Kaleidoscope!
- Blog/Facebook comments.
... Enough said. Everyone loves those!
- My niece 5 mins away.
... My 3 year old niece Elisa lives so close, I love getting to spend time with her. We have a special song we we made up and sing together regularly, "It's Emily and Elisa day, it's Emily and Elisa day, IT'S EMILY AND ELISA DAY, HURRRRRRAAAAY!!!" We're getting really good at it, of course there's lots of jumps and squeals and wiggles mixed in between.
- Road Trip!
... Leaving Thursday for a road trip with my good friend Erin to go see Kels in TEXAS! Excited for the adventure and the spontaneous combustion of craziness that is inevitable when we're together.
...seriously, if you haven't tried it, it will change your life. Somehow this liquidy chocolaty goodness goes hard when it touches ice cream, creating sensational magic inside your mouth.
- The fact I have my days off.
...I tried for awhile to get a 2nd job for the day time, but so glad I didn't. Spent today with Ashley and wedding crafts, and tomorrow with Ang and my sis (and the little ones!) to Kaleidoscope!
- Blog/Facebook comments.
... Enough said. Everyone loves those!
- My niece 5 mins away.
... My 3 year old niece Elisa lives so close, I love getting to spend time with her. We have a special song we we made up and sing together regularly, "It's Emily and Elisa day, it's Emily and Elisa day, IT'S EMILY AND ELISA DAY, HURRRRRRAAAAY!!!" We're getting really good at it, of course there's lots of jumps and squeals and wiggles mixed in between.
- Road Trip!
... Leaving Thursday for a road trip with my good friend Erin to go see Kels in TEXAS! Excited for the adventure and the spontaneous combustion of craziness that is inevitable when we're together.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Ways I Feel Love
My dad asks me routinely how my cars working. Whenever I go somewhere he worries I don't have enough money and it takes heavy persuasion to reassure him I'll be fine.
My mom is so patient with me. She makes herself available and ready to help with absolutely anything and everything. Especially when I get lost driving more than I'd like to admit, she always becomes a loving Gardin.
My brothers voluntarily help me with my technological issues, even if it means a big time commitment.
My sister likes to dream with me and supports me in them.
I feel love in excited hellos or when people ask, listen, and then remember later to ask how that thing is going. And when people share their food with me. :)
I heard a guy say the other day that he considered being appreciative one of the purposes in life. I want to slow down and appreciate these things.
My mom is so patient with me. She makes herself available and ready to help with absolutely anything and everything. Especially when I get lost driving more than I'd like to admit, she always becomes a loving Gardin.
My brothers voluntarily help me with my technological issues, even if it means a big time commitment.
My sister likes to dream with me and supports me in them.
I feel love in excited hellos or when people ask, listen, and then remember later to ask how that thing is going. And when people share their food with me. :)
I heard a guy say the other day that he considered being appreciative one of the purposes in life. I want to slow down and appreciate these things.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Summer Time!
If I were to pin point one of my absolute favorite feelings in the world (okay-- maybe just on the top ten) it would have to be summer time driving,
windows all the way down,
feet out the window (preferably not driving!),
music way up
and on route to an adventure.
The smell of fresh air and feeling of hair tussling. Man, this gets me excited just thinking about it! I would have trail mix and big sun glasses and I would be on my way to go canoeing/rafting/tubing/anything with wonderful company. Ahhhhhhhhhh sweet summertime.
windows all the way down,
feet out the window (preferably not driving!),
music way up
and on route to an adventure.
The smell of fresh air and feeling of hair tussling. Man, this gets me excited just thinking about it! I would have trail mix and big sun glasses and I would be on my way to go canoeing/rafting/tubing/anything with wonderful company. Ahhhhhhhhhh sweet summertime.
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